In Over My Head

Hey guys! I know it's been while since I've written on here, but I've kind of been taking a break from the whole social media thing. It was a good refresher to focus more on what's really going on in my life rather than social media. Anyways, I felt like something was on my heart and felt like I should share it. Everyday I try to start my day off the same way and keep a routine going of eating breakfast and listening to some worship music. I feel like that gets my day going in the right direction and there's just something about waking up to worship music that puts you in a great mood. I've recently started listening to Bethel Music and my favorite song right now is called, "In Over My Head". The lyrics have really been speaking to me because we have all felt like we have been "in over our heads" at some point in our lives. Whether its things that are going on like sickness, worrying about job security, financial security etc. There's always something going on in our lives and at times it feels as though we are so in over our head. For instance,  right now in my life its the uncertainty game that our life is surrounded by almost every summer. Figuring out where we will be living and where I'll be playing this season and hoping that it will be safe and secure. The uncertainty in the waiting is one of the worst feelings to have going on especially in the summertime when your wanting to really enjoy the short time at home. At this point I do feel a little "in over my head". But there is one verse of this song that says, 

"I’m standing knee deep but I’m out where never been
I feel You coming and I hear Your voice on the wind.

Would you come and tear down the boxes that I have tried to put You in
Let love come teach me who You are again
Take me back to the place where my heart was only about You
And all I wanted was just to be with You

Come and do whatever You want to"

Sometimes I do feel like I'm standing knee deep in all of the things that this life has going on around me, and it does feel like unchartered territory. I lash out and get short and frustrated with the things that I really don't need to be worried about. I love how it says "take me back to the place where my heart was only about you. Come and do whatever you want to". Every time I hear that verse, it's almost like a calming affect that comes over me and for those next few minutes, I feel as though I'm not standing knee deep in sinking sand. I know it's easier said than done to just allow God to come into our lives and do whatever He wants to because we are all so focused on controlling every part of our lives. But, the reality of it is that we don't control anything. We are and always will be on God's impeccable timing and the more we come to know that truth, the more we will be able to say "Come and do whatever you want to". I know for me this time of uncertainty or the "waiting game" is always part of God's plan and His timing is always perfect. So relax and take hope in the fact that even though you may feel as though you are "In Over Your Head", God's got you and all you need to do is allow Him to tear down the boxes of worries that you have. Let Him do whatever He wants to. If you haven't heard this song yet, check it out HERE and I hope it has the same affect on you as it does on me. That calming affect that no matter how deep you feel you may be, God can and will get you out and place you exactly where you need to be. 

Why Do We Chose to be Average?

It was Friday morning and we were headed to our morning conditioning just trying to wake up. My teammate Emmanuel Holloway was listening to the HipHop Preacher Eric Thomas when I got in the car. If you guys haven't heard him speak, check out the video at the bottom of the post and it will change your life I promise you. Anyways, the subject he was talking about was Be Phenomenal or Be Forgotten and it immediately struck me. I began to question myself as to why some of us chose the latter. Some of us choose to just be a face in the crowd that just goes along with the flow instead of using the Phenomenal talents that God placed in us to do something "Great." I began to wonder about myself first and foremost. I asked myself the same question and wondered to myself am I being Phenomenal? Am I making all the right strides to be "Great?" First off, I know that God has blessed me with so many great things and talents, but do I use those natural talents to be Phenomenal? I don't think that it's a bad thing to question ourselves when it comes to trying to become better. Honestly more of us should be asking those questions so that we can all help build each other up to be "Great."

Most people believe that they strive to do something Phenomenal, but I think we set the bar too low for ourselves, so that we always reach our goals. When we reach those low goals, we never have to endure the struggle or the pain of not accomplishing what we initially set out to do. Instead we just give ourselves a false sense of self pride and accomplishment. Eric Thomas thinks that one reason we are average is because we look at all these celebrities and sports figures and try to live vicariously through them. These people are being Phenomenal and its easier for us to imagine ourselves at the same point as them instead of going out and trying to be Phenomenal. We make decisions in our lives each and every day on trying to be better from the friends that we choose to hang around with to how we chose to do our job. You might not be at that dream job or that dream place in your life, but don't be average. Strive to make everything you do and every decision you make take you toward being Phenomenal. I'm going to try my best each day to make decisions that will allow me to be Phenomenal because I never won't to be Forgotten. Everyone was placed on this earth with multiple gifts and talents, but it is OUR choice as to how we use those gifts and talents. Do we use those talents to do Phenomenal things and stand out in the crowd? or Do we just use 50% of those talents to be average and be Forgotten? The choice is OURS guys and I dare you guys to choose wisely everyday. I'll leave you guys with this quote from Eric Thomas, "Embrace the struggle because without struggle there is no process, so embrace the struggle and remember that a setback is a set up for a major comeback." Stand out of the crowd and be allergic to Average as Eric Thomas would say. Till next time guys! Have a Blessed Weekend.

Another Adventure

Hey Guys! I know its been a long time since you guys have heard from me and I'm sorry about that. I'm going to try to give you guys a quick recap sometime soon, but for this post I want to talk about the new adventure that we are on. The summer has come and gone quickly, and most basketball players know that it's time to get ready for a new adventure wherever that may be. A lot of guys will be going to different teams, different countries, and different situations. They will go into their new situation not knowing what to expect and wondering how they will adapt. Thankfully, I have been extremely blessed to go back to a place I call my home away from home.

For some of you that don't know, this past season I had the opportunity to play for a team in Ravenna, Italy. I had the same feeling that most do with the great unknown. You worry about where your going to be living. Are people going to be able to understand me? Am I going to be able to shop at the grocery store? Even simple things like, am I going to have a TV? Most people haven't experienced moving to a new country not knowing at all what to expect and they have no idea what were talking about and why we would be so silly to worry about those little things. But, those things even as silly as they might seem, bring us back into our comfort level and make us feel as though we are HOME! As I said before, I had no idea what to expect coming into Ravenna. My worries and all the little things that we worry about going overseas was immediately put to rest with how hospitable the people were.  The town of Ravenna welcomed us with open arms and we really felt as though we were at home. Things were a little easier because of the other American Adam Sollazzo. He did a great job of showing us around and letting us know that if we need anything to not hesitate and call him. That hospitality the people of Ravenna showed us struck a deeper connection for us more than any other situation we had been in the past.

This summer, I was blessed again to receive an offer to comeback to that great place and in my heart, there was no hesitation to go back. So here I am, back in my Home away from Home with my role being that of the veteran American. It is now my job to show the new American Emmanuel Holloway the ropes and help lead him to have the same experience that I had the year before. I can't foresee what is going to happen on the basketball court for us as a team, but I do know that Ravenna will always be my 2nd home and I will always forever be grateful for the city that helped make us feel as though we belonged. I hope that I can help Emmanuel feel the same way that I do now about Ravenna. It's another adventure, but this time feels more like a Homecoming! Till next time.

Failure

It's Monday morning and my mind is still wondering about what happened this past weekend. We had a huge game and everything was going our way until "it" happened. "It" is the situation we all want to be in as competitors. We all have an eternal hunger to be placed in a situation where what we do can determine the outcome. Those situations we are placed in I feel like help define us. I had the ball with the ability to make the game winning shot. I was hungry for the chance to make the winning play for my team and lead us to a much deserved win. But then "it" happened. I was dribbling the ball waiting for the opportunity to make my move and all the sudden I see the ball rolling out of bounds. My heart sunk into my stomach and I realized that I had just lost the game for my team. I've never had a situation like that happen to me in all my years of playing this wonderful game. We ended up losing the game and you can only imagine the heart wrenching feeling I had on the walk back into the locker room. I felt like I had let my teammates down. I've always felt that in any team game the worst thing you can do as a teammate is to let the guys in that locker room down. That night after the game I couldn't sleep at all. I could only keep replaying that image of the ball rolling out of bounds. That next morning I woke up and prayed about what happened. I asked God why would he let something like this happen to me and consequently my team. Then he spoke to me and told me that we all have to go through these failures at times. We all have situations in which we feel that we have everything it takes to thrive in those situations. But as God always does, he flips the script on us. I had to figure out if I was going to sit around and sulk about the situation or if I was going to move on and learn from it. Was I going to let this simple mistake define me as a basketball player or was I going to use this situation to make me better. Many people have seen all the great game winners that Michael Jordan has hit in his career, but what people don't know is for as many shots as he did make, he also missed more than he made. When we fail, it's up to us to pick ourselves up and dust ourselves off. We must use that failure to fuel us. To ignite something in us to be better, greater, and stronger. You gain strength when you fail because you know that if you continue to strive for greatness, you will succeed more than you will fail. I won't let this define me or define my life. What about you? 

Life's Journey So Far...

Hey to all you die hard Singletary Report readers! I know it has been a while since I've written to you guys and told you about what is going on in my life, but this summer has been kind of crazy so far. I've been traveling a little bit with the family as well as having to get my wisdom teeth out. We all know how fun getting your wisdom teeth out can be. This summer God has blessed me with the opportunity to see some of the most amazing places on this Earth and I felt like I should share with you guys about my journey. After we won the championship in the D-League, I got an offer to go play for Barako Bull a team in the Philippines. I was basically there on a tryout basis to see how I would fit into their team and to see if I would be a good fit for their next conference season coming up. We played in a tournament in Dubai and I got to see one of the most amazing places on this Earth. It's funny how we as basketball players that get to travel, take for granted the places that we get to visit and experience. I've seen some places that most people won't ever get to visit and I feel like it's an injustice almost to those people if I don't write about my visits. The Philippines was awfully surprising to me with how warm and embracing the people were to me. It's hard to judge when you first get these offers to go to this countries as to how you will be accepted and treated. But in the Philippines, I was treated with a lot of kindness and they really took care of me. I think it really is amazing how God places us in these different places and cultures to broaden our horizons on different parts of the world. I think he does this to give us an open mind of how other countries can be just as amazing as this beautiful country that we live in. When I got told that we were getting a chance to go to Dubai, I immediately began researching and looking at pictures. If you ever have some time go to google and type in Dubai and click on images. You will be amazed at some of the pictures that show up and it almost looks as if they are fake. I really enjoyed Dubai and told my wife Alec that one day I would take her back there so she could experience it all. My next trip was a family trip to Florida to see some of my wife's family. It was going to be the first time that I had gone to Florida and I've always heard good things about it. I mean who doesn't like to be on the beach all day and in the ocean enjoying the beautiful breeze. It was definitely a great trip to meet some of the family members that I hadn't met yet. We had a condo on Amelia Island and were about 40 steps away from the beach. I can honestly say that all these trips have really changed my view on traveling. When I was younger, I wasn't very big on traveling and going outside of the country to see some of these places. But now that I have, I would honestly tell anyone that if you have a opportunity to go explore some of these different parts of the world, it should be a no brainer. Life is to short for us to want to be bottled up in our comfort zone. Jump outside that comfort zone. You will soon figure out how close minded you were and realize how much you have been missing out on in your life. That's enough rambling on for me, but I do want to leave you guys with a little slide show I made of my travels. Hope you enjoy. Until next time.

Fatherless

I started this blog to be very personal about not only my life, but the experiences that I have gone through. I want all of my readers to know more about me and my life, so that whatever they are going through they have someone to relate to. I titled this blog fatherless because I like too much of the population grew up fatherless. My dad was around when I was younger until my parents got a divorce and when that happened it seemed like I never saw him again. My mom would always ask me if I would want to talk to my father and of course my answer would be No. I was so angry and hurt that he wasn't around during my years of being a teen. Those are the times when you need your father more than anything. To teach you how to be a man, how to be responsible, and how to grow up in to be the man God created you to be. I never had that and for so long I held this deep dark demon in my heart that hated my father. I remember distinctly in high school when I was asked many times by different people, "Is your dad Mike Singletary the football coach?". I was so embarrassed and hurt that I didn't have the "ideal" family with a dad around that I would often tell people that he was my dad. Don't get me wrong I was never ashamed of my mom and the hard work that she put in to deal with my brother and I growing up. But, every kid needs a father figure in their lives and a mother can't be the role of both parents as hard as they try. I was fortunate enough to have my grandpa around as well as my Uncle Chris who really taught me what it takes to be a man. My uncle passed away in April of 2009 and I miss him very much, but I am glad that he was around to help me grow into the man that I am today. I now have my step father Hawk Carter who has become a father to my brother and I. He has been to a lot of basketball games and football games for us both as well as teaching us how to be responsible. It wasn't until later I found out that when I thought I was fatherless as a young kid, all along I had a father. Someone that I could always turn to and talk to whenever I needed advice or needed guidance. Someone who was watching over me and helping me to be the man that I was created to be. God was and always will be my father and I'm sad that it took me so long to realize how truly blessed I am to have a father like that. So to all of you out there growing up and feeling the same way I was when I was younger, just remember that you are not "fatherless." You are not alone. God is and always will be there for you in your time of need and in him we can do great things beyond our own imagination. I hope that this helps some of you out and gives you a look into my life.

Champion

It's 5:30 in the morning and I can't sleep because my mind is wondering about all the things that have happened throughout this season. Through the great times and the bad times, this season has overall been a good year for me personally as well as in a team aspect. Coming into this season I had no idea what to expect because every year you have the same routine of waiting and finding out what the best deal for you will be. Whether that is overseas or whether in my case this year the D-League, it is all about patience and trusting in your agents to work for you. The season started off great for me personally. I had a big role on a team full of really talented guys and we got off to a good start for the first part of the season. Just when I thought that everything was going really well, I got traded to the Erie Bayhawks. I had no idea what was going on and it all happened so fast that I almost felt betrayed by Rio Grande Valley even though it's all just business. It makes you think that your not good enough or that what you were doing wasn't enough for them to keep you around. But, I had no idea that God was working in a mysterious way for me throughout the season. It's usually during those times of uncertainty and questioning that God is usually working that much more for you. It took me some time to really realize that and when I did, it made me that much better. I kept telling myself that I would use this trade as motivation to basically stick it to the Vipers for trading me and I would make them really think hard about why they made such a decision. Things in Erie didn't go as I had planned and thought they would. My role kind of diminished from what it was like earlier. During one of the times when I was at my lowest, I got hurt. Once I got hurt I got frustrated and stopped seeing the good things throughout the situation I was in and that really hampered my game. With that frustration came the loss in confidence of my game and any basketball player can tell you that once you lose confidence in your self, it's hard to get it back. I tried to play throughout the injury and I just kept hurting my ankle.Took a while, but  I finally got healed up and started to gain my confidence back. We were making a playoff push and I had told myself that I was going to do everything in my power to help this team win the championship. As we were coming back from a road trip, I had a gut feeling that something was wrong. My mind began to wonder about many different scenarios and finally I just had to ask Coach what was going on. He told me that I had been traded and all I could think of was, "Wow, again. What is wrong with me? Is basketball really something I should continue to pursue?". I took it all in and asked him where I had been traded. He told me that I was traded back to the Vipers and at that moment I had so many feelings going on in my head. I didn't know what God was doing and when we don't usually know what's going on, we begin to question God. We begin to think, "Why are you putting my family and I through all this change and uncertainty." But, we fail to realize that he is testing our faith and patience to accept his will for our lives. When I got back to the Vipers, the team was completely different then when I left, but I was really grateful to be back. There were only a few guys that were left from the team when I was here earlier and I had no idea what my role would be like coming back. It started back where I had left off and I had a big role on the team, but soon that changed. My role diminished again and I began to get frustrated again about not playing as much as I felt like I should be playing. I had to take a look at myself and figure out that I could only control what I could and when I was given my time, I had to do the most with it. When I changed my thinking, God really rewarded my team and I by allowing us the opportunity to win a championship. It was an unbelievable ride as we won our last 16 games and broke many records along the way. I was really blessed to get to play with this group of guys, the great coaching staff and a really awesome organization as a whole. This season has really come around full circle for me personally. I've learned to not worry so much about the things that are going on in my life because every change is God putting us in a position to set us up for success. We have to just accept that change as hard as it might be and move forward knowing that he is in our corner. When God is in your corner you can NEVER lose! I'm just thankful that God blessed me with the ability to go through all the things that I went through this year. I got the ability to play for a great organization and to play with a great group of guys. At the end of the day, the ups and downs even the uncertainty was definitely worth it. Excited for what God has next for my wife and I!